Do I Do It or Don't I Do It?

After that disastrous dental procedure in October - the one in which I suddenly and uncharacteristically felt an attack of anxiety - I was not happy to discover that I needed another such procedure. The lower tooth is now perfectly fine. But when I felt an all-too-familiar pain in the upper tooth right across from it, I knew what I was in for. The dentist merely confirmed the diagnosis.

Because of my previous anxiety attack, I asked about taking anxiety medication prior to the second procedure. The dentist's office staff readily agreed to write the prescription. Ask, and ye shall receive. I felt relief just over the thought of receiving relief.

Yet as the date drew near, I began to think again. I didn't take the Valium that was strongly suggested before my Lasik eye surgery four years ago, and I was fine. I didn't have an epidural when in labor, and I was fine. Clearly, I was not fine during my last dental procedure, though. Hmm.

The second procedure was scheduled for this morning.

Up until yesterday, I still didn't know what to do. Then I decided that my indecision was indicating that, deep-down, I didn't want to take anxiety medication after all.

So I didn't.

Yet I wondered whether my reluctance was sign of (1) my stubbornness to receive perfectly acceptable help, or (2) a desire to face my anxiety head-on by finding emotional and mental ways of dealing with it.

By that time, it was out of my hands (no time to fill the prescription). So the answer was anyone's guess.

Before the appointment, I worked out. Exercise always helps to clear my mind and give me positive energy for the day. Then I took a hot, hot shower and put on warm, comfortable clothes. While showering and changing, I visualized the steps of the procedure (which was easy to do since I'd gone through it so recently). I imagined what the dentist and his assistant would be doing during each step, how it would feel (I hoped to feel nothing!), how I would feel about it.

Then it was time to see whether my relaxation and visualization strategies worked.

And did they? you wonder.

Actually, yes - they did! So now, in retrospect, I can label this experience not as stubbornness, but as successful coping.

And I'm not worried about my next dentist appointment. Whenever that might be... Hopefully, not soon...