Yes, the animals/subjects may have peripheral awareness of the researcher's presence, but as long as he stays out of the way, is quiet, and doesn't interfere with the animals' mating or hunting rituals, he is allowed to live.
If he makes his presence known, however, the game is over. He's upset the balance of the animal's life.
I have my own social wilderness in which to observe: My son is the subject; his habitat is Facebook.He knows that my husband and I can see everything in his account. At the time we allowed him to set up the account, this was a deal-breaker: Either he could "Friend" us and gives us full privilege to see everything that he posts or that is posted to his Wall, or no Facebook.
He agreed because he was 11 years old and he really wanted the FB account. And also because he's a good kid so he doesn't actually have anything to hide. Yet.
He explicitly understands our rules, but I also understand the unspoken rule of Parents Who FB Friend Their Children: although we can see everything on his page, we're not supposed to actually post anything to his page. Because anything we say can and will be construed as weird or embarrassing or outdated or something-that-we-think-sounds-hip-but-isn't. And then we will incur his wrath.
Somehow - I don't know how - I intuited this unspoken rule. The only thing I have posted to my son's account was a simple "Happy Birthday." Nothing clever or witty. No pictures of him as a baby.
I'm the social researcher/mom observing a subject/her son in the wild. If I'm too conspicuous, I will upset the natural balance of his social life. And then, one day as he gets older and wiser to the privacy settings of his account, he'll block me from seeing his Wall.
Oh, it's true. I've heard of this happening with other researchers/subjects - oops, I mean parents/children. Especially in those teen years.
Alas, my husband did not intuit this rule. Though he and our son are very compatible in the real world - our son inherited my husband's sense of humor, so they really do "get" each other - my husband learned recently that their relationship is quite different in the virtual social world.
His crime? While getting ready to drive my son to the allergist's office for his weekly shot, he posted this on my son's wall: "Time to get your tickle poke."
That didn't go over so well.
Yeah, it's cute when a girl my son likes playfully refers to shots as "tickle pokes." But mortifying when Dad announces it that way.
The post has been removed.
In the meantime, I'm sittin' pretty. Just inconspicuously reading and watching my boy interact in his social habitat. Not making a sound. Not drawing any attention. Hoping he'll forget I'm there.
If I play the game right, maybe he won't block me for another year or two.
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2 comments:
Yeah good luck with that. I had no idea that I was blocked...just thought he was only playing farmville. Not actually socializing. To my dismay I sat down at the family computer one night and he was signed in and had left it open. There were hundreds of posts....none of which I can see. Maybe I'll just wait for another day he forgets to sign off and I will go in and change by block.;) Until then I wait.
I like your thinking - I would do the same in the case of my own child while he's a minor in my house. We've always told the kids, regarding electronic communication: "There is no expectation of privacy. Until you're 18, expect that we can and will exercise our right to monitor what you write online." This hasn't hit home yet, because they're only 10 and 12 years old. But we expect some pouts of resistance when they're 16!
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